


Painflower

by neferlemon



Category: Infinite (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Historical, Angst, Drama, Human Sacrifice, Joseon au, M/M, Romance, fucked-up family, fucked-up religion
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-05-28
Updated: 2017-06-09
Packaged: 2018-11-05 21:28:59
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 13,200
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11021949
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/neferlemon/pseuds/neferlemon
Summary: Myungsoo is the youngest acolyte ever appointed from his temple, blessed with an honor to prepare the rare, once-for-every-generation Flowering Ritual. Sungyeol is the firstborn of the Lee clan, groomed since birth to be the sacrifice of the same ritual.In which Myungsoo spends all his life taking care of the flower of his faith, only to realize that he hopes for the flower not to bloom instead





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So I have a bad habit of writing easier things first. This idea came to me when I was reading about Joseon Kingdom for my Tea for Two, and somehow the plot developed and I just couldn't stop writing. So instead of finishing Tea for Two, I finished this first /cover face/
> 
> Anyway, please enjoy the story!

 

 

 

**1**

His step is clumsy, but he keeps going. His bare feet makes a squeaking noise as they come in contact with the wooden floor of the corridor, but he keeps going. He ducks his head as he walks to reach the Goddess’ Hall, but even doing so doesn’t make him less aware of the attention he is getting. He can hear the apprentices of the Flower Temple whispers among themselves when he passes.

“He must be the youngest acolyte ever, he’s barely 20. Usually the Priest doesn’t take anyone younger than 30.”

“Then why him? Is he any special?”

“He is the longest apprentice in this Temple. He came here when he was ten.”

“Donggun Sunbae has been here for fifteen years and he’s not yet promoted.”

Myungsoo tries to suppress the embarrassment he feels. Being proud over something that the Goddess has given him is vanity and vanity is sin. It’s not that Myungsoo is that much cleverer or more pious than any of them. Myungsoo was as surprised as them when he received the news that they are going to promote him in his youthful age. He asked and asked again, wondering if they are not mistaken and no, they are not. Myungsoo is going to be promoted.

Maybe it is true that the Priest promotes him simply because he has stayed here the longest. Most of the kids start apprenticing at the age of 15, Myungsoo started at 10. However, it’s not like Myungsoo is the only one with that record.

Donggun started his apprentice when he was 20. He is 35 now, and he is not yet promoted into acolyte.

Not that he needs to feel guilty. This promotion is not about competition, it’s about service to the Goddess. If Donggun is better than Myungsoo, he won’t feel any resentment or envy toward him.

With this thought in mind, he tries to walk faster, only to end up hitting somebody in the corner.

“Be careful,” says a calm, serene voice.

Myungsoo looks up and sees none other than Donggun himself. The senior is staring at Myungsoo without any particular expression while holding a heavy load of scrolls. Myungsoo shudders against his own will. Donggun is not a man of many word, and certainly not a man of many expression as well. He is always so serene, so expressionless, so… not human.

It’s part of what makes him receive a lot of respects from the other apprentices. After all, a servant of the Goddess should not show likes or dislikes toward worldly trivial matters. Display of emotion is not encouraged in the Flower Temple.

“I’m sorry,” Myungsoo bows deeply. “I wasn’t looking.”

“It’s quite alright,” Donggun says. “Don’t let them wait for too long.”

With those words, he leaves. Myungsoo stares at his retreating back, wondering once again why they chose him over the perfect apprentice. Myungsoo still has a long way to catch up to Donggun. He could never mask his expression. He doesn’t really cry anymore, but he still smiles sometimes when he sees the flowers in the garden bloom and he still feels like something is pulling at his heartstring on a serene morning when he is looking at sunrise.

Myungsoo shakes his head to get rid of unnecessary thought. It’s not his place to question the Priest or his choice.

The promotion ceremony takes place today, in the Goddess’ Hall where only the highly important ceremonies are held. The Priest and his line of assistants and acolytes are waiting for him there.

When he arrives in front of the hall, he announces his presence. When the Priest commands him to enter, he opens the door and steps inside.

Inside, the Priest stands in front of the Goddess statue at the other end of the hall. A long mat has been spread on the floor, flowers of various kinds are scattered on it, making a path from the door to the place where the Priest is standing. His assistants and the other acolytes are standing neatly on the either side of the mat.

“Come, my son,” the Priest commands and Myungsoo takes a step forward, not too fast, not too slow, until he arrives in front of the highest leader of their Flower Temple.

“Bow your head to the Goddess and tell Her what you are here for.”

Myungsoo kneels, bowing his head to look at the floor.

“I came here to offer my best service to the Goddess of Flower, the Maiden of Beauty, and the Mother of Nature.”

“The Goddess only takes everything, or nothing at all. Will you give everything within yourself, including your heart and your soul, your body and your life, your faith and your trust to Her?”

“All of mine is Hers,” Myungsoo answers.

“Will you do everything She asks you without doubt or insincerity, question or rebellion?”

“All of my action is for Her.”

“Do you submit to and admit Her command, Her power, Her grace?”

“I submit and I admit.”

The Priest calls one of his assistant, who brings with him a glass of red wine. The Priest takes it and tells Myungsoo to stand up and drinks the wine. Myungsoo complies, drinking it in one gulp until the last drop. It tastes bitterer than any medicine and Myungsoo remembers the first day he came here as the apprentice. He drank white wine that time. If later he is promoted to be an assistant, he will drink a black wine. They said it tasted so bitter and strong you may faint immediately after consuming it.

“From now on and later,” the Priest continues, waking Myungsoo up from his thought. “You are the acolyte of the Flower Goddess. You will have no desire for yourself, only for your Goddess. You will have no possession, only faith for your Goddess. You will do nothing but for your Goddess. Kim Myungsoo, from now on you I declare you to serve Her as an acolyte.”

Myungsoo bows his body to the Goddess and the Priest, returning the glass on his hand. The Priest takes it and the rest of the assistants and acolytes clap their hand silently to signify the end of the ceremony. The Priest dismisses them and soon there are quiet sounds of people removing themselves from the room.

Only when there are only the two of them left, the Priest tells Myungsoo to sit down.

“Now Myungsoo,” the Priest says. “I’m sure you have some questions for me about this promotion.”

Myungsoo looks at his teacher, not expecting the invitation to ask.

“I do wonder, Teacher,” Myungsoo answers. “But if it is what She wants, then I will voice my wonderment no longer.”

The Priest meets his gaze.

“The reason is because of the village,” the Priest tells him.

The village he is talking about is the Flower Village, where their Temple falls under its jurisdiction. The population is about 800 people and they are governed by Lee clan, which is also the founding clan of the village. Myungsoo goes there sometimes, to collect offerings from the residents and buy supplies for their temple. It is a beautiful and peaceful village, full of flowers, just like its name.

Myungsoo wonders what the village has to do with his appointment as an acolyte.

“Have you ever heard,” the Priest asks him instead, “about the Painflower?”

Myungsoo hesitates a little before nodding. He has heard of it. In fact, he learned it as soon as he stepped his foot inside the village gates. It is a legend that is still alive among the villagers.

Hundreds of years ago, this place was just a small barren land under a barren mount where nothing could grow and live. Nobody could make a living here, until a married couple arrived. The myth said that they were exiled from their family and had no other place to go.

When they arrived at this place, they had no more strength to continue their journey. They had no choice but to settle down, but this place offered nothing but water, so they prayed.

It is said that the Goddess of Flower heard their plea and came down from the heaven to help. She grew trees, flowers and other plants on the barren land, turning it into a beautiful and resourceful settlement. It started attracting people, and the small settlement developed into one rich village under the leadership of the couple.

As an exchange for all of this, the Goddess asked the couple for their firstborn when he reaches the age of 21.

Initially, the couple agreed easily. However, once the village has grown and they were appointed as the leader, they became greedy. They didn’t want to give their firstborn, who would inherit their wealth and their title, to the Goddess.

Instead of sacrificing their firstborn, they sacrificed a calf instead, wrapped under a red fabric, to deceive the Goddess. The Goddess found out their trick and angered, she cursed the village. The trees and the flowers and the plants died. Maladies and sickness came. People were suffering.

The couple begged for forgiveness, and since the Goddess forgives those who seek forgiveness first, she agreed to give them one more chance.

In the couple’s big house, She grew a tree. Once for every generation of the family, they have to sacrifice their firstborn under the tree. His or her blood must be spilled on its roots. If the tree blooms, it means the Goddess accepts their sacrifice and the village will be safe for a generation.

The tree is called the Painflower and it is still standing tall in the garden of the Lee clan, the descendant of the couple in the legend. The sacrifice is known as the Flowering Ritual. 

To participate in such a ritual that enables one to serve the Goddess and protect the village is considered an honor for any of the follower of their Flower Temple, who worships the Flower Goddess.

“Well,” the Priest says, looking satisfied with Myungsoo’s nod. “It is time.”

Myungsoo keeps his gaze steady, even if he is shaking inside. Now he knows why he is promoted. The ritual is held with some help from the Temple and the one who should draw the blade and sacrifice the firstborn, Myungsoo has heard, should be the youngest amongst the ranked acolytes of the temple.

“It is an honor for me, Teacher,” Myungsoo answers.

“Very well,” the Priest stands up. “The ritual will be held in three months and I’m sending you to the Lee’s house to prepare their firstborn for the sacrifice. You will go there tomorrow morning, so use the rest of this day to pray for the Goddess and ask Her to help you with the task.”

“I will do that, Teacher.”

“Then I’ll leave you here,” the Priest nods to him and steps quietly outside. Only after Myungsoo hears the door closing he lets himself trembles.

Myungsoo spends the entire day praying in the Goddess’ Hall and when he comes back to his room, the rest of the apprentices have already fallen asleep. Quietly, Myungsoo reaches for his rattan bag and starts to pack.

“Myungsoo?” he almost jumps when he hears someone whispering his name.

Myungsoo looks back, trying to find out who is it calling him. Donggun is looking at him, still without expression, from his place.

“The Flowering Ritual is dangerous,” he says. “Evil always surrounds the sacrifice. Be careful.”

Myungsoo doesn’t answer, only nods as he sets his bag aside, already finished packing a little possession he has. He lies down on his bed, trying to get to sleep, but he can’t really quiet the thoughts running in his head.

Myungsoo now is an acolyte, and his first task is to kill a man his own age and offer his blood to his Goddess.

-

 

 

 

Myungsoo wakes up early in the morning when most of the apprentices are still curling up on their bed. He looks at them quietly. The rest of them will continue their peaceful days in this temple, but Myungsoo’s life will be different from now on.

Truthfully, even if he has stayed here for 10 years, he doesn’t feel any regret leaving this place. He has learned to never keep anything in his heart except his faith. So, he quietly gathers his bag and slides out of the room.

The Priest and two of his assistants are already awake and waiting in the front gate of the Temple. From here, they will walk through the forest to the village. Myungsoo knows it will take around one hour of walking and by the time they arrive at the village, the sun will be up.

“Do you know anything about the Lee clan, Myungsoo?” The Priests asks him as they start their journey.

“Only a little, Teacher. I know that they are the founding family of the village. They are ancient and noble household,” Myungsoo answers him. He often hears the villagers speak highly of the Lees when he visits the village.

“Do you know the firstborn they are going to sacrifice?”

This time Myungsoo shakes his head. As much as Myungsoo has heard of them, he actually never sees any member of the Lee family with his own eyes. He figures that noble family doesn’t roam the village road as often as the other villagers.

“The firstborn is a son,” the Priest tells him. “The Lees have three sons.”

Myungsoo nods, storing this information.

“However, the brothers have different mother,” the Priest continues. Myungsoo tilts his head. While in their religion polygamy is not illegal, it is frowned upon, and he doesn’t expect such a high standing family like the Lees to participate in it.

However, it is not his job to judge.

When they arrive at the village, the day has just started. People are pouring out of their house. Some of them heading to the market to sell and buy things, some heading to the field, and some heading to their workplace. They pass them all without talking until they arrive at the Lee residence in the center of the village. 

Myungsoo passes this house sometimes when he goes to the village, but the gates are always closed. This time, he’ll get to see what is behind the tall fence as their small group stops in front of the gate. One of the Priest’s assistants knocks the gate and a small window on the gate opens.

“What is your business here?” the guard whose face is peeking from the small opening asks.

“We come from the Flower Temple. We received summon from Lord Lee two days ago.”

The guard nods and tells them to wait. The windows close again and a moment later the gates creak opens to let them inside.

The residence is huge. Their temple has a grand hall where they study, eat and listen to the Priest’s preach; the Goddess’ hall; five smaller prayer’s hall; the Priest’s quarter; the assistants’ quarter; the acolytes’ quarter; the apprentices’ quarter; kitchen; and guesthouse. This place is easily twice as large.

The guard leads them past several small buildings until they arrive at the biggest building in the complex. The guard announces their presence in front of the door and opens it when they are called.

Behind the door is a luxurious room with thick mat and delicately carved mast. On the wall there were expensive draperies showing exquisite painting that Myungsoo sure costs fortunes. Even the furniture in the room – the drawers and cupboards and boxes – are of meticulous handiwork.

Sitting at the end of the room is the head of the Lee household. He is a man of at least fifty, with hard expression and dark eyes that makes Myungsoo shivers. Even without the man opening his mouth, Myungsoo knows that you should never cross him.

A young man is sitting next to him. He is pretty beyond belief that it is hard to imagine that he is the son of the man sitting imposingly at his side. Myungsoo guesses he must be the sacrifice.  

“My Lord,” the Priest bows to the family head and Myungsoo follows suit.

Lord Lee bows back, as well as his son. Introductions are made.

The pretty son’s name is Lee Sungjong, and he is not the sacrifice. He is only 17 and he is the third son. He is calm and speaks only when he is asked by his father. He looks at their group with a solemnity that Myungsoo guesses has something to do with the task they are about to carry to his brother.

The middle son’s name is Lee Howon, 21. He is currently away from home, attending elite government academy Sungkyunkwan. From their short conversation Myungsoo finds out that he is an accomplished scholar and warrior. From the way his father speaks of him, he knows immediately that he is the apple of his father’s eye.

_So,_ Myungsoo thinks, _where is the firstborn?_

Myungsoo is not sure if he says those words out loud or not, but Lord Lee seems displeased as he calls one of his servants.

“You haven’t found the boy yet?” he asks, tone crude and cold, questioning the whereabouts of what it seems like his firstborn.

“I’m terribly sorry, My Lord. We’re still looking for him.”

“Find him in five minutes or you’ll receive the consequence. How can he embarrass me when we are receiving guest?”

The Priest calms the Lord, telling him that he doesn’t mind to wait, but it seems like it does little to appease the irritation of Lord Lee. Five minutes passes without any appearance from the missing son, and it continues to ten minutes. After fifteen minutes and still there is no sign of the missing sons joining them anytime soon, Lord Lee finally just starts the discussion after apologizing for the behavior of his troublesome son.

Myungsoo is introduced to the family as the acolyte that will guard and prepare the firstborn for the ritual. His task is to ensure the firstborn’s purity for the offering. By purity, they mean everything from glutton to lust. From today onward, the sacrifice is not allowed to drink alcohol and have contact with the outer world, unless with servants and the family within this wall.

“Your name is Myungsoo, huh?” Lord Lee suddenly addresses Myungsoo, making him jumps from his wandering thought.

“Yes, Sir,” Myungsoo answers while ducking his head.

“Are you clever enough?”

“Pardon me?”

“My firstborn is quite problematic,” the father explains, his tone hold no fondness. “We’re guarding him heavily so he won’t be able to go out and get some alcohol or women in his hand. However, like you see, sometimes he is too clever for our own guard and can hide or escape wherever he wants. I want you not only to perform the ritual for him, but also to keep him from butchering the ritual by ruining his purity. Do you understand what I mean?”

“I understand, Sir.”

“You’ll get your room next to Sungyeol. You can meet him later and introduce yourself when we’ve found him. For now, I have another business to attend. Excuse me,” Lord Lee says, standing up without waiting for any of their answer.

Sungjong regards them with a small bitter smile.

“I guess it’s my job to show you your room, then,” he says.

“I can ask the servant, if you’re busy,” Myungsoo tells him.

“It’s fine. I have nothing to do anyway.”

Myungsoo and his group follow Sungjong out of the building, passing through another lawn until they reach a rather secluded house in the back of the complex. Sungjong stops in one of the door and opens it, showing a bare room of medium size.

“This is your room,” he says. “Sungyeol Hyung’s room is in the middle.”

Myungsoo says thank you and Sungjong leaves them. After observing the room, the Priest instructs Myungsoo on his task and leads a prayer for the four of them inside the room. When they finish, Myungsoo sends them back to the Temple, following them as far as the gate.

Only after the gate closes again Myungsoo realizes that there is no way he could reach his room in the back by himself. He can ask the direction from some servant, but he has time to kill and he can explore the complex and familiarize himself with it.

Myungsoo decides to go clockwork from the gate. That way, eventually he will reach the back of the complex and find his room. He walks past several small buildings and empty yards and sees the guard’s quarter, the kitchen, and a well, until he finds a garden in the west part of the house.

The garden is not exactly beautiful. Myungsoo passed another garden earlier when Sungjong led him to his room, and it’s well-cared, full of blooming flowers in the early summer.

This garden is not neglected as well, but it is rather empty. Rather than full of flower bushes, this place is full of greenery instead. The center of the garden is a barren, cherry-blossom like tree that is wilting at the hot and humid weather of early summer. There is a flat stone bench under the tree.

Something about the spot forces Myungsoo to stop. This side of the complex is curiously empty. There is nobody around – not even a servant – and he saw them scattered here and there before. Myungsoo feels the atmosphere getting heavy, his eyes losing focus, and it immediately comes to him that this place must be where they hold the Flowering Ritual.

That’s the tree then. Painflower, they called it. Some called it Bloodflower. It will bloom when the sacrifice’s blood is spilled on its root. They said the flowers looks a lot like cherry-blossom, but instead of pink they are crimson red, like freshly spilled blood.

The flat stone is not a bench then. Rather, it’s an altar.

Myungsoo is getting goosebump.

His thought is interrupted by a loud commotion from outside the wall, behind the thick bushes of greenery. He looks up and sees someone climbing up the wall. Alarmed, Myungsoo is about to scream and alert the guard of the intruder, but his voice doesn’t make it past his throat.

The man who climbs the fence hasn’t seen him yet, but Myungsoo does, and he silently observes him. His hair is long and the man makes it into a ponytail, but some strands get loose and the wind blows them prettily. His complexion is rosy from the physical effort to pull the rest of his body past the wall. His eyes are shining brightly and he is smiling in happiness, clearly he was just having a good time.

His liveliness overwhelms Myungsoo, tugging something inside of him that shouldn’t have been there.

It seems like his presence even affect his surroundings. He lifts the heaviness of the atmosphere and breaks the unsettling quietness of the secluded lawn.

The man who is breaking into the Lee residence says something to someone over the wall and waves, before finally manages to pull his body up the wall and lands easily on the ground. From the way he does it, Myungsoo knows this is not the first time he does this. Once landed, the man straightens his clothes and walks away happily, like jumping over the fence is a perfectly acceptable way to get inside someone’s house.

That is, until he sees Myungsoo.

The man stops abruptly, eyes widening in alarm for a moment before it calms down.

“Who are you?” he asks first before Myungsoo can utter any word. “I’ve never seen you before.”

Myungsoo guesses this is Sungyeol, the firstborn, the sacrifice. He observes the man closely, from his disheveled hair to his mud-stained shoes. The man observes him as well, tilting his head in curiosity, before approaching him and start poking him with his fingers.

“Are you a new servant?” the man asks. “But you don’t wear the servant’s clothes. Also, you’re too handsome to be one, I think. Are you Howon’s friend from Sungkyunkwan? He said he’ll bring a friend home this holiday. But he said he’d be here by next week the fastest. Maybe you are Sungjongie’s friend? Ah, but I know he is only friend with pretty woman. So, who are you?”

Myungsoo’s impression of Sungyeol is that this man is too happy to be a sacrifice. Myungsoo imagines someone somber, maybe bitter over his fate or even angry for his fate. Sungjong would fit the image better.

But this boy? This boy is actually _giggling_ as he pokes Myungsoo.

Myungsoo is disturbed. A sacrifice shouldn’t be too attached to this world. He shouldn’t find pleasure in food, people or worldly possession. He should be calm and detached, so it won’t be too hard for him when the day to serve the Goddess comes.

“Hey? Are you deaf? Can’t you speak? Why don’t you answer my question?” Sungyeol is groping his arm now. Myungsoo puts a gentle hand to stop and lower it away from his arm before answering.

“I guess you are Lee Sungyeol. Nice to finally meet you, I’m the acolyte from the Temple, and I will be your companion from today onward until the day of your offering.”

Sungyeol’s eyes widen again when he hears about the offering, but that’s the only reaction Myungsoo gets from him. Myungsoo expects him to be angry or sad, but if he feels any of that, he hides it expertly.

“Companion?” Sungyeol asks, the only emotion Myungsoo can detect is curiosity and interest. “What is a companion? Why do I need a companion?”

"Aren't you familiar with the aspects of the ritual? Haven't you learn about it from your Father?"

If Myungsoo is the one with such a fate, he imagines he would like to know everything about the ritual that he will give his life for, but Sungyeol merely shrughs.

"Sunggyu may or may not have explained it. I don't know, I never really listen."

Once again, Myungsoo is taken aback at how lightly this particular sacrifice treats his own fate.

"Then there is a lot of thing that you should learn with me," he tells Sungyeol. "Maybe it's best to start right away. We don't really have time."

"So, companion is another word for tutor? Gosh! No, thank you. I have enough with Sunggyu, I refuse to waste my time learning something I won't be able to use in the future anyway."

Myungsoo doesn't expect this behavior at all when he imagines how his sacrifice will be. Trying hard to suppress his bewilderement, he walks first to lead the way to the (hopefully right) direction of Sungyeol's quarter.

"You seem like you're as stuck up as Sunggyu," he hears Sungyeol mutters behind him. Myungsoo ignores him.

"But don't be offended, at least you're way cuter compared to him."

Myungsoo frowns. Is the sacrifice flirting with him right now?

When they arrive at Sungyeol's quarter, they find someone else waiting in front of the door. His annoyed expression shows that he has been there for quite some time and his already small eyes are narrowing upon seeing them. Sungyeol scrambles to hide behind him.

"Lee Sungyeol!" the man yells, and even Myungsoo has to grimace hearing it. The tone suggests a painful punishment. "Where the hell have you been?"

"I was having a lesson with my companion," says Sungyeol behind his back and Myungsoo raises his eyes for such a brazen lie. Does he expect Myungsoo to just go along with it? In his dream. Myungsoo looks at the man in front of the door, who he guess is Sunggyu, and shakes his head.

A flash of satisfaction appears on Sunggyu's face and he draws a long wooden stick from his sleeve as he runs toward them. Sungyeol yelps and let go of him, running away from his tutor's wrath, screaming.

"It's not fair! I only get the stick if I make three consecutive mistakes! This is only my first! Ouuuch!"

The tutor finally lands a blow on Sungyeol's thighs. "This is only your first, huh? Well, it's worth three mistakes. You skipped your study, sneaked out of the house and lied to me! You are asking for this!"

"Companion, help me!" Sungyeol wails. "Your sacrifice is about to die three months earlier!"

The sight of Sunggyu smacking Sungyeol's thighs repeatedly on the lawn, with the former looks like he is having the time of his life while the latter shows a scandalized expression, is bizarre and completely unexpected, but it is… for a lack of better word... comedic.

Myungsoo is wondering whether they are making fun of him or not.

Sunggyu finally stops smacking and sends Sungyeol to his room and study, because he'll test him an hour later. Grumbling all the way, Sungyeol obeys him, but not before asking if his companion will go with him.

"No," Sunggyu decides it for Myungsoo before Myungsoo can say anything. "I need to talk to him. You just sit down and study and don't you  even think of leaving your room, even for bathroom break!"

Sungyeol throws him a nasty expression, before looking at Myungsoo's way and asks. "Good luck talking with him, Companion. Can you annoy him during the conversation for my sake? He hates nonsensical and roundabout answers, and will go extremely red in the face if you're asking him about a certain someone named Nam Woohyun, it's fun. Try not to get intimidated by him! Oh, by the way, what is your name? I can't keep calling you Companion, it's inconvenient!"

He actually says all of that in one breath. Next to him, Sunggyu goes red in an alarming speed.

"My name is Kim Myungsoo," he says before the sacrifice closes the door.

"Kim Myungsoo," Sungyeol repeats, before brilliantly grinning. "Good luck accompanying me!"

When Sungyeol finally closes the door, Sunggyu approaches him and gestures to a stone bench under the shade of a plum tree. Myungsoo sits down, but instead of following him, Sunggyu just stands up and observes him from head to toe.

Not liking the height difference, Myungsoo asks him to sit down.

"What do you think about Sungyeol?" Sunggyu  gives him an unexpected question instead of following his request. Myungsoo wonders if there is a trap in this question.

"What I think about him doesn't matter," Myungsoo answers instead. "But I have some questions about him for you."

Sunggyu's eyes is still piercing into his own. "What do you mean it doesn't matter? Aren't you the one who decides whether he is fit for the sacrifice or not?"

"You're mistaken. The one who decides that is the Goddess. I'm only preparing him for Her," Myungsoo says calmly. "For that I have some questions for you."

"You mean," Sunggyu says slowly, "he's going to be sacrificed, fit or not fit?"

"On the day of his 21st birthday, we'll offer him to the Goddess. Whether she accepts him or not, it's not something I can decide. All I can do is to prepare him as best as I could. Now, are you willing to answer some questions for me?"

Reluctantly, Sunggyu nods. Myungsoo's answer earlier doesn't seem to satisfy him.

"Is he still virgin?"

Sunggyu takes a moment to answer.

"He should be. His eunuch checks his bedding and clothes every day and night."

Myungsoo nods. That’s the most important thing in the ritual. The firstborn must be virgin.

"Did he ever committed a sin against other people?"

"He gives me ulcer and periodically shortens my lifespan with his attitude, does it count?"

Myungsoo is sure Sunggyu is being sarcastic, but somehow there is a hopeful undertones in his sentences. Just how much Sungyeol gives this man stress, Myungsoo doesn't want to know.

"Does he drink?"

"He is never drunk enough for us to know. We never give him at house, but he hangs out with Nam Woohyun whenever he is sneaking out and I bet my life that there must be alcohol involved  somewhere."

Myungsoo thinks about it carefully, eyes observing Sungyeol’s quarter. For someone as carefree as him, Sungyeol actually keeps his behavior if he is still virgin, clean from big sin, and even never been caught drunk. Does that mean the sacrifice actually take the Flowering seriously?

Myungsoo turns his head back to Sunggyu.

"Who is Nam Woohyun?"

Sunggyu goes beet red in a second and Myungsoo is sure it can't be healthy. It is amusing, though. He can't blame Sungyeol for suggesting the trick. Making Sunggyu embarrassed is fun.

"You better not pick up any bad behavior from him. You're supposed make him more agreeable for the Goddess!"

With that, Sunggyu retreats to Sungyeol's quarter to restart his lesson, leaving Myungsoo snickering quietly under the plum tree.

Myungsoo spends the rest of the day in his room, praying to the Goddess while Sungyeol and Sunggyu are studying in the next room.

In the evening, a servant tells him that he is expected to have dinner with the Lees. Myungsoo doesn't expect any invitation.

"I thought I'm supposed to eat dinner with the rest of the staff?" he asks the servant who leads him into the main quarter.

"Yes, but today the Lord want you to dine with him."

Myungsoo tries to pry for the reason, but the servant doesn't know better, so he gives up.

When he arrives at the main quarter, Lord Lee, Sungyeol and Sungjong are already seated in front of their table.

"Myungsoo-shi, it's kind of you to join us. Would you take a seat next to Sungjong?" Lord Lee greets him and shows him the empty cushion next to his youngest son.  As soon as he sits down, a servant brings him a table full of dinner.

In the temple he never has such an elaborate menu for dinner. Usually it's only rice and vegetables, followed by fruits if they are in season. Today, on his table he sees a bowl of meaty stew, various wild herbs and vegetables, tofu, nuts and at least five different side dishes.

"I hope you enjoy the food, Myungsoo-shi. Please don't hesitate to ask more for rice if it's not enough. Thanks to Howon who has revolutionized the farming method for our villagers, this year we are blessed with abundance of rice," Lord Lee says, satisfied with himself for boasting his son to another person.

"Thank you very much for your generosity. I will eat what I can take," Myungsoo answers politely before picking up his chopstick and starting to eat. The rice is indeed high quality, Myungsoo can feel the difference in the size and the taste.

"What do you learn in the temple? It’s a shame Howon is not home yet. I think you will find a lot of things in common with him. He also studies religion and philosophy. It's not even his favorite subject but he still excel at it.”

“It seems like Howon is a very accomplished prodigy,” Myungsoo offers politely.

“He is indeed," Lord Lee looks pleased. “Do you know that is a champion at archery and horse riding as well?”

“Hyung is very talented," Sungjong offers.

"You’re talented too, Sungjong,” Sungyeol suddenly interrupts. “You can play music well.”

“You play music?” Myungsoo shifts his attention to Sungjong. “What instrument do you play?”

Sungjong blushes. “I'm not as good as Sungyeol Hyung claims to be. But yes, I play music. I play flute.”

“Bah, music,” says Lord Lee in contempt. “What good does it bring to us aside from breaking my ears? A boy should just study or train, not play useless music nobody listens, though I suppose it’s still better than lurking around doing nothing.”

His eyes are burning into Sungyeol, who seems like he is deliberately avoiding him as he nonchalantly continues eating.

Myungsoo keeps his opinion on himself. This family sure has a lot of problem, but Myungsoo is not going to disturb anything.

“Sungyeol Hyung is studying a lot,” Sungjong says quietly.

“Just stay out of trouble until you can prove yourself to be useful three months later,” Lord Lee says to his oldest son.

Sungyeol continues eating, his eyes dull and his lips thin. He looks a lot like a proper sacrifice this way.

Myungsoo swallows the uneasiness in his throat along with his rice.

-

 

 

Sungyeol’s demeanor drastically changes the moment they are out of his father’s presence. His eyes lit up with mischievous glint and his lips are turned upward, like he has a whole night full of fun ahead.

“Sungjong, have you introduced yourself to Myungsoo?” Sungyeol says, trying to make a conversation as they make their way to a large and dark building behind the Main Quarter.

“I have, this morning when you were _sneaking out_ ,” Sungjong rolls his eyes.

“And what do you think of him? He is my companion from the Temple. Do you think he is religious enough?”

Myungsoo listens to the two brothers exchanging words like he isn’t walking behind them quietly.

“I don’t know. There’s only one way to check it, right?” Sungjong’s voice suddenly carries the same mischief as Sungyeol’s. Myungsoo deadpans as the two brothers abruptly turn their head toward him with suspicious grin.

“Myungsoo, do you know what building is this?” Sungyeol points to the big dark building they are passing. Myungsoo wonders what this can be. The building is beautiful, but it seems abandoned for quite a long time already.

“This is the Wife’s Quarter, where our stepmother used to live,” Sungjong whispers. “It is abandoned now because there’s no woman left in our household, but because of that as well… this place is _haunted_.”

“So?” Myungsoo asks as they continue walking under a peach tree. “Even ghosts submit to the Goddess of Flower.”

“Oh, believe me, this one is nasty,” Sungyeol says. “She appears out of nowhere with her disfigured face and smelly hair. Do you know what she smells like? Like a rotten meat! She is still rotting even as a ghost, and sometimes you can even see larva coming out of her sliced skin and –“

And he is interrupted by something that falls from above, right in front of them. That something looks exactly like what Sungyeol had just described: a woman in battered white attire, disheveled long black hair, dirt and dried blood smearing on her skin, and Myungsoo was sure he could see larvae peeking out of her hair. She was slumped on the ground, not a meter from them.

“A REAL GHOOOOOOSTTTTT!”

Unexpectedly Sungjong screams and jumps, then runs like there is no tomorrow, leaving Myungsoo and his brother in front of the building.

Myungsoo lies if he says he isn’t shaken. Even Sungyeol seems trembling, judging from how bad his shoulder is shaking. Myungsoo is reaching out to calm the boy down, when he Sungyeol doubles over in laughter.

“That Sungjong – that brat – hahaha! He actually fell for this! Stupid boy!” Sungyeol continues laughing. “He thinks this is real!”

Sungyeol pulls the – er – woman to him and then Myungsoo sees that’s it’s not a woman at all. It’s just a badly made scarecrow in long white dress.

“Did you pull this on us?” he asks Sungyeol in disbelief.

“Yes!” Sungyeol proudly admits the fact. “Look, doesn’t she look real? I even breed a jar of larva for the final touch. As expected, extra work means extra result.”

At those words some larva simultaneously appears among the scarecrow’s hair, as if reiterating his point. Myungsoo sighs, feeling a headache coming.

“Let’s just go back to our room,” he says.

“Okay,” Sungyeol cheerfully agrees. “Let’s just put this _noona_ casually standing here to surprise some more people.”

They leave the scarecrow standing under the tree, before continuing to walk to their quarter. Behind the Wife’s Quarter is the Wife’s Garden, the exquisite, well-cared garden Myungsoo saw earlier in the day.

Sungyeol hums as they walk, apparently still happy from his earlier success at scaring his younger brother, and Myungsoo suddenly finds himself asking. “Why are you doing this?”

Sungyeol stops humming and looks at him in confusion.

“Humming? Because I’m happy?”

“But why are you happy?” Myungsoo asks. He has thought about it since morning, but he can’t find any reason for a sacrifice, whose birthday is in less than three months, to be happy.

“Am I not allowed to be happy?” Sungyeol asks back.

“It’s not that you’re not allowed, but usually one is not looking forward to his own death,” Myungsoo says. And Sungyeol’s behavior has caused him to develop a nagging suspicion on his mind.

“Could it be that you’re happy because you know you won’t die? You’re planning to run away, aren’t you?” Myungsoo charges ahead.

“Isn’t it the other way around, Myungsoo?” Sungyeol asks back. “I’m happy because it doesn’t matter for me, whether I’ll die or not. I’m happy because I’m not sad leaving the world behind. If you’re worried I’m going to run away and mess up the Flowering, don’t waste your time! I won’t run away. I have nowhere to go anyway.”

Myungsoo blinks his eyes several times, trying to digest Sungyeol’s answer. For some reason, it doesn’t really reassure him.

They continue walking when this time it’s Sungyeol who gives him a question.

“And you, Myungsoo?” he asks. “If you’re not going to die, why don’t you look happy?”

-

 

 

 

 


	2. Chapter 2

**2**

The night is cool, they are outside, but Myungsoo feels suffocated all of a sudden. Sungyeol looks straight at him, his eyes shines in the surrounding darkness.

Myungsoo unclenches his hands then carefully answers. “It doesn’t matter what I feel.”

“Is that so?” Sungyeol replies. “Then what I feel shouldn’t matter as well, should it?”

They continue their walk in silence. Sungyeol walks slightly in front of him and Myungsoo observes the sacrifice’s back, wondering if he really hiding something under his sleeve.

That first night, Myungsoo finds it hard to sleep, even if his mattress is softer and his room is warmer than what he got in the temple. He keeps thinking of Sungyeol and how everything about him as a sacrifice both makes sense and doesn’t. Is he really not angry? Is he actually religious? Does he understand what being a sacrifice is? Why does he look so happy?

All Myungsoo knows is that Sungyeol is so… silly. He remembers their unexpected meeting that afternoon and the ghost Sungyeol made and he smiles.

Myungsoo doesn’t know at what point he falls asleep, but he is woken up by a suspicious sound from the next room not long after.

Alarmed, he sits down and listens quietly. Sure, the sound is not merely his imagination. He glances at a timewatch, his most treasured posession from his father when he was a child. It's only 5 AM. He wonders what Sungyeol is doing at such an early hours.

His thought immediately jumps to the suspicion that the man is trying to run away. Myungsoo doesn't curse, but he expresses the same sentiment internally as he stands up, intending to check the mischief Sungyeol is up to by his own eyes.

The sound doesn't cease even when Myungsoo approaches the door. There is rustling and tying, it really sounds like someone is packing. Panic rises inside him and he immediately slides the door to Sungyeol's room open, intending to stop whatever it is the mischievous man is doing.

He doesn't expect to find Sungyeol in the middle of undressing. He is topless, his sleeping garments crumpled on the floor. His pants are not yet fastened, they hang low on his hips.

His bare skin glows under the candlelight and Myungsoo stops breathing, stops thinking.

Sungyeol lets out a surprised yelp and only then Myungsoo snaps out of his stun and slams the door. He can hear Sungyeol yelling and the rustling sound continues much more loudly and rapidly.

Two guards appear, alarmed by Sungyeol's scream, but Myungsoo explains the misunderstanding to them and they soon leave again grumbling.

Myungsoo himself is still rooted on his place in front of Sungyeol's door until it slides open once again, revealing Sungyeol, this time fully dressed in his day clothes.

"For Goddess' sake, why the hell did you do that?" he demands as soon as their eyes meet.

Myungsoo feels his cheeks heating, embarrassed from the event earlier.

"Sorry," he says sheepishly. "I heard weird sounds from your room, I thought you were up to no good and I wanted to stop you."

Sungyeol folds his arms on his chest while staring at him unimpressed. "Geez," he says. "Thanks to you the guard will patrol around here this morning and I lose my chance to sneak out."

Myungsoo looks up. "So you are really planning to sneak out!" he exclaimed, then blushes because he has raised his volume. A Goddess' servant should always speak quietly. "Goddess, really. It's a good thing then I managed to stop you."

"It's not a good thing since now I can't meet Woohyun like I promised him to," Sungyeol pouts.

"You're not supposed to meet him anyway," Myungsoo says, finally manages to calm himself. "And you shouldn't make a promise you're not sure you can fulfill."

Sungyeol wrinkles his nose hearing Myungsoo's lecture. "This is too early for me to hear such a preach. Sunggyu's lesson doesn't even start until nine."

Sungyeol makes a frustrated noise and walks away. Myungsoo makes sure to follow, afraid the man will sneak out at any given opportunity without supervision. Sungyeol notices him and he looks back, barking.

"Go away!"

"No," Myungsoo says. "I'm your companion. I will accompany you wherever you go from now on."

Sungyeol looks like he is about to argue, but suddenly he closes his mouth and turns around, ready to bolt. Myungsoo grabs him by reflex, because he is still picturing Sungyeol running away in his mind.

He doesn’t expect for Sungjong to appear at that moment and whack Sungyeol’s head with his flute.

Sungyeol yelps and jumps, Myungsoo lets him go because he is surprised.

“Yah, Lee Sungjong!” Sungyeol runs his hands through his hair, touching the abused skull.

“That’s for last night, you good-for-nothing Hyung,” the maknae of the Lees are folding his hands in front of his chest, eyebrows raised in challenge.

“What? It’s not my fault if you’re stupid,” Sungyeol glares. “Why are you awake at this hour anyway?”

“Practice,” Sungjong says, showing his flute. “Why are _you_?”

“I don’t want to tell you,” Sungyeol says nonchalantly. “Anyway, don’t practice too much! You have to study too, your Sungkyunkwan exam is next year.”

“But I don’t want to enter Sungkyunkwan,” Sungjong pouts.

“How can a young man like you have no ambition at all?” Sungyeol makes a protest. “If you don’t enter Sungkyunkwan, how else are you going to survive later? You can’t depend on this house forever!”

“I won’t ever pass that exam,” Sungjong whines. “I’m not Howon Hyung.”

“That’s why you should study, Brat,” Sungyeol says, before turning his head to Myungsoo. “Myungsoo, tell him to study.”

Myungsoo doesn’t expect to get involved in this brotherly conversation and has no desire to be involved as well, so he just shrugs. Sungyeol groans.

“Goddess, you’re not as useful as I thought!”

“I’m obliged to be useful for my Goddess, not for you,” Myungsoo answers.

“And I was just about to recruit you to help me execute my plan. Now you’ll have to forget about it. You can go back to your room and sleep, Myungsoo.”

As if Myungsoo can do that. He’s pretty sure now that Sungyeol has something in his mind and he isn’t going to let him do it, whatever it is.

Sungjong senses it as well.

“What are you going to do?” the youngest can sound quite threatening. “You are going to make troubles again, aren’t you?”

Sungyeol smiles innocently. “What do you mean trouble? I just want to help Gyu Hyung relax a little.”

He doesn’t fool anybody, judging from the way Sungjong sighs in suffering. “There’s no way I can talk you not to do it, right?”

“Damn right!” Sungyeol pumps his fist to the air in glee. “You know nothing can stop me. Anyway, now you can get back to your practice or help me, your choice.”

Unexpectedly, Sungjong smirks back. “I mean, why would I want to talk you out of pranking _Sunggyu Hyung_? I’d love to see that!”

“Finally you show me that you can make me proud,” Sungyeol gives his brother a thumb up. Sungjong smiles proudly, before he remembers about Myungsoo and frowns.

“But aren’t you supposed to stop him?” he asks the acolyte.

He probably is. However, a harmless prank is hardly an unforgivable sin. He doesn’t want to deny a little happiness from a sacrifice. Also, he wants to see how this is going to end. Sungyeol makes him curious.  

“No,” Myungsoo says.

Sungyeol gives him a thumb up too, complete with a proud expression, and it is so weird but it makes him feel the same.

“Alright, no more talk until we reach Sunggyu’s Quarter.”

Sungyeol takes the lead, walking stealthily to another part of the house Myungsoo hasn’t visited yet. There is a small building with a distinguished blue door and Sungyeol signals that it is their target. They creep closer to the door, listening to any sound from inside, but Sunggyu is most likely still asleep.

Sungyeol pulls a bottle from his pouch and shows it to them.

"Ink?" Myungsoo asks, keeping his volume down. Sungjong rolls his eyes.

Sungyeol flashes him a brilliant grin and pour the entire flask of ink on the floor right in front of the door.

“I thought we’re doing something _dangerous_ but this can’t be anymore childish!” Sungjong scolds his brother in whispers, but Sungyeol hits him to stay quiet, his expression lights up in glee.

Myungsoo starts to feel unsure, but he tells himself that this is a kindness, a little happiness he wants to give for a man who will not live for a longer time. It is pity.

The object of his pity is currently looking like someone has given him the world. In one smooth motion, Sungyeol pulls both Sungjong and him to the side of the house which has a window on its wall.

"Don't look so offended, Dongsaeng. That was not even the best part," Sungyeol says, his tone makes Myungsoo shiver.

He pulls out another flask of ink along with a long string out of nowhere. He proceeds to make a simple trick with them so that when whoever the unfortunate soul that lives in this building opens the window, he will pulls a string and gets a heap of ink poured on top of his head.

"You are evil," Myungsoo declares and it seems like Sungyeol is taking it as a compliment.

Sungyeol is making the final tie for the trap when someone calls his name.

"Sungyeol-ah?"

The three of them stiffen, afraid to be caught in the act, but then the man reveals himself and Sungyeol relaxes, even calling him back.

"Woohyun Hyung!"

"I knew it. The moment I saw those ink all over the floor I thought you must be around here somehow!"

Woohyun must be Nam Woohyun, the man Sungyeol meets when he sneaks out and the man Sunggyu gets red all over for. He is an attractive man with dimples when he smiles, and Myungsoo for a reasin he doesn't understand, doesn't like him.

"How could you get inside? Did they really let you in?" Sungyeol embraces his best friend, who returns the embrace back. Myungsoo notes this with a frown. Any form of attachment to other people - relationship, friendship - should be cut from Sungyeol from today.

"I told them that Sunggyu called me," Woohyun says, releasing Sungyeol and gives a hug for Sungjong as well.

"And they believe you?"

"Not at first, so they send a servant to confirm it to Sunggyu, and you know Sunggyu will never refuse to see me," Woohyun explains.

Sungyeol smiles happily. "Sometimes I forget how useful Sunggyu Hyung is for us. Maybe I shouldn't be too hard to him today. But wait, does that mean he is actually awake?"

The moment Sungyeol closes his mouth, they hear someone slides the front door open, followed by a yelp and a loud sound of someone slipping and falling.

A moment of silence and then....

"LEE SUNGYEOLLLL!!!"

The four of them exchange a half amused and half panicked gaze and Sungyeol instructs.

"Run!"

-

 

 

 

Once when he was twelve, Myungsoo got a dishwashing duty and accidentally broke a plate. Feared of the consequence, he hid the broken pieces on his sock. They cut his feet and that was how he got found.

The Priest taught Myungsoo then not to run away from his responsibility and own every mistake and sin he makes.

Today, he is twenty and he is giving his everything into running away from Sunggyu's wrath after he lets Sungyeol messed around with the older man's patience.

"We... shouldn't have ran... away," Myungsoo says, out of breath. Maybe it's not too late to give themselves up now. "The Goddess... forgives those... who seek forgiveness first."

"Shut up, 'Soo," he hears Sungyeol says. "I don't know... about the Goddess... but I know Sunggyu is not as forgiving."

He hears Woohyun and Sungjong laugh and Sungyeol follows. Myungsoo himself tries to suppress a smile. Not long after, they realize that you can't really run and laugh at the same time and they collapse in pavillion.

"God, that was..." Sungjong tries to speak. "That was..."

"Brilliant," Sungyeol supplies.

"I was about to say stupid..." Woohyun says, but soon breaks again in laughter.

Myungsoo, red faced and out of breath, finally unable to hold his laughter as well. He lets out a chuckle at first, but soon he can't help but laugh out loud, slapping the wooden floor of the pavillion and clapping his hands.

Sungyeol, Sungjong, and Woohyun looks at him, astonished.

"Wow, Myungsoo-shi, this is the first time I see someone from the temple laugh this loud," Sungjong says, amazed. "Are you that happy?"

Woohyun looks at him closely for the first time, as they haven’t met before. “Who are you?”

“He’s Sungyeol’s Hyung companion from the Temple. You know, for the Flowering.”

Woohyun’s face hardens, his gaze gradually become less friendly. He looks like he has a lot to say, but he keeps it from himself either because he doesn’t want to start a fight or to upset them all.

Not realizing any of these, Sungyeol turns to Myungsoo, "I think you should laugh more often. You look prettier when you laugh."

Sungyeol compliments him often, Myungsoo realizes. And each time it grows on him. He ignores any of them yesterday, but he wonders why today he likes it.

Goddess, have mercy, Myungsoo thinks. Sungyeol makes him feel weird. They only met yesterday, but Myungsoo has actually already helped him run after committing a mischief.

“Your flowers are wilting again, Sungyeol-ah,” Woohyun says, interrupting Myungsoo’s thought. He is holding a flower on his hand. Myungsoo wonders where does he get it from, and then realizes that they are in the middle of a garden. This must be a different garden then the beautiful Middle Garden or the eerie Sacred Garden where the Painflower grows. This one is located in the very back of the residence, larger than the other two gardens, and has been abandoned for a long time.

Sungyeol takes the flower from Woohyun’s hand, he looks troubled. “It’s too big for me to take care alone, but I tried my best.”

From what he can see, there are patches of flowers here and there, but they are overridden by growing weeds. He can see what looks like ornamental stones turned over in a corner.

This garden is even worse than the small herbs garden the servants keep behind the kitchen.

“What is this place?” Myungsoo asks. It doesn’t make sense to Myungsoo why Lord Lee who looks like he cares so much about appearance deliberately neglect this garden.

“It’s our mother’s garden,” Sungyeol answers, suddenly begins to smile. “I mean mine and Sungjongie’s. She loved it. She could easily spend all her days in this garden, sitting in this pavilion writing poems or just walking around. This place used to be so beautiful.”

“Why aren’t anybody taking care of it?” Myungsoo asks.

“Like I said earlier, this place is too big for me to keep alone.”

“I help too,” Sungjong voices his protest.

“Yeah, yeah,” Sungyeol jumps from the pavilion, starting to walk. “I mean if you call sitting on the pavilion playing your flute while I work helps, then you can say you do.”

Myungsoo follows Sungyeol walking deeper into the garden. Behind him, Woohyun jumps down as well, but he goes to different part of the garden.

Sungyeol stops in front of a battered shed where people used to keep gardening tools and pulls out a rake. He proceeds to gather the fallen leaves scattering on the garden. A very odd thing for a firstborn of a nobility to do.

“I mean, why isn’t there any servant to take care of this place?”

“Father doesn’t want them to. There are many other task that is more important than that. We can’t afford them to take care of such a large garden that nobody wants to see anyway.”

“But this is your mother’s garden. Surely your father wants to see it?”

Sungyeol gives him a disapproving look, which Myungsoo takes as a cue to stop asking.

“Why don’t you help me instead of questioning me? I don’t know that someone from the Temple can talk this much.”

Myungsoo shuts his mouth. He did talk too much today, probably twice more than what he usually says at the Temple, and it’s just after breakfast.

On the other side of the garden, Woohyun walks with familiar steps. It seems like he has been here hundreds of time, which should not be the case, since Sungyeol is not actually allowed to make a close friend.

“Is Woohyun here often?” he narrows his eyes, watching the greasy man giving support to some crooked plants with tree branches.

“He used to, until my mother passed away,” Sungyeol says. “He’s a distant cousin from my mother’s side. But seriously, Myungsoo. Help me!”

Myungsoo finds another rake in the shed and proceeds to help Sungyeol. The latter already has several lines of clean ground and a small pile of leaves on the end of the lines. Myungsoo observes the boy, who is unusually quiet and focused. He looks like he takes raking leaves more seriously than his own life.

“Myungsoo, don’t just stand there looking stupid!”

Myungsoo smiles and obeys, working alongside of the sacrifice. He is on his second line when he hears pleasant melody from direction of the pavilion. From the distance, he can see Sungjong has pulled out his flute and started playing.

“He’s good, isn’t he?” Sungyeol asks him, expression proud and fond.

It’s nice to see that at least these two brothers are getting along despite their father’s harsh treatment. He wonders if they get along with their middle brother too.

They keep working until lunch time, and Myungsoo sees a servant comes to the garden, bowing to Sungjong in the pavilion who stops playing.

It seems like the servant is saying something important, because Sungjong waves his hand to attract their attention. Myungsoo nudges his sacrifice to let him know. Frowning, Sungyeol approaches his brother and the servant.

“What’s wrong?” he asks. From the other direction, Woohyun is also approaching.

“Nongshim said Father is home,” Sungjong says, frowning as well. “He wants us to have lunch with him at the Guest Hall, with Myungsoo-shi too.”

“Father is home for lunch and he wants us to join him? What the hell happens?”

“Pardon me, Young Master. I have no idea, but if you would come to the Guest Hall…”

“We’ll be there, don’t worry. Take this to the shed, will you? And Myungsoo’s too.” Sungyeol hands his rake to the servant and points at Myungsoo’s before turning his head to his best friend.

Woohyun notices the attention and waves his hand nonchalantly. “It’s okay, go! I’ll eat with Sunggyu Hyung!”

“Sorry,” Sungyeol says, “I wish I can take you to lunch with us too.”

“Your father will flip,” Woohyun laughs. “I’m not even supposed to be inside these walls.”

“Don’t worry, Sunggyu Hyung will protect you,” Sungyeol says, hugging his best friend. “Tell him I’m sorry and try to get him into a good mood before my afternoon study.”

Woohyun laughs and slaps his back before shooing them to go. Sungyeol and Sungjong immediately leave the garden, Sungyeol taking Myungsoo’s hand with him.

“I don’t know Woohyun is close with Sunggyu,” he tells the brother on their way to the guest hall. They pass the staff’s quarter, library, Middle Garden, and the main quarter before reaching the guest hall.

“Sunggyu tutored Woohyun before tutoring me,” Sungyeol explains. “Apparently they hit it off with each other and their relationship continues to be more than a tutor and his student, though I’m forever curious what they see in each other.”

“For now, I’m more curious why Father skips work and chooses to lunch at home,” Sungjong says, cutting Sungyeol’s unneeded opinion.

Soon they arrived at the Guest Hall. The door is open and when they enter the room, Sungyeol freezes for a moment, prompting Myungsoo to look better at the assembled people in the room.

Inside, Lord Lee is beaming with happiness. Sitting next to him are two men Myungsoo is not familiar with.

“Howon,” Sungyeol says, more to himself than to greet the man in front of him. It still earns him an acknowledging nod from one of the young men.

Howon looks much closer to his father than both Sungyeol and Sungjong, who resembles their mother more than their father. However, while Lord Lee’s sharp gaze are cold and cruel, Howon’s are calm and reassuring.

Much to Myungsoo’s surprise, he doesn’t look that much younger compared to Sungyeol. Maybe there is only a year of difference between them.

He doesn’t know the other young man who sits next to Howon with a big grin on his face, but he likes him immediately.

“Sit down,” Lord Lee beckons them to get closer. Reluctantly, Sungyeol does while Myungsoo follows. Sungyeol takes the empty seat next to Sungjong, so Myungsoo has to take the one left next to Howon. When he has properly sat down, Lord Lee addresses him.

“Myungsoo-shi, it’s a pleasure for me to finally able to introduce my son, Howon. You have to wait for a day, but Howon got an early break from the academy because he received perfect score in his last exam.”

Lord Lee’s voice holds that proud tone he always has whenever he talks about his second son. Myungsoo looks at the man next to him and nods awkwardly.

“Good to meet you,” he says.

“Good to meet you too,” Howon answers. His voice is deep and serene. “I’ve heard that you’re here to help preparing the Flowering.”

“Yes,” Myungsoo says. “More precisely, I’m accompanying Sungyeol until the day of the Flowering.”

If Howon has any feeling about the Flowering – whether positive or negative – it doesn’t show on his face. Instead, he turns to the other unfamiliar man in the room.

“This is Dongwoo,” he says, introducing the man to them. “My friend from the academy. He is very interested with the Flowering and wants to be present during the ritual.”

Dongwoo smiles and introduces himself. His handshake is strong and enthusiastic, but Myungsoo finds his earlier interest fades. He doesn’t think one should treat the Flowering as an object of sightseeing.

“Tell us about the archery competition you won before the break, Howon,” Lord Lee asks his son, who calmly proceeds to do what his father told him.

It seems like Lord Lee has every right to be proud about his second son. Howon has brought home with him a letter from his headmaster, full of praise about what an accomplished scholar he is, that makes Lord Lee pours himself a cup of liquor in the middle of the day. He also told them about the competition he won – archery, horse riding and calligraphy.

In front of them however, Sungyeol merely looks bored while Sungjong’s face is a mix of amazement and anxiety. Dongwoo is listening attentively to his friend, sometimes adding a bit of information to the story.

“You’re going to be the greatest leader for the village, Howon,”Lord Lee laughs in merriment, pouring himself another cup of liquor. “Actually, at your level, I think you can even make it into central government. As expected from Naeun’s son! You’re very different from your brothers.”

Sungjong’s face goes even paler while Sungyeol, unimpressed, reaching for a piece of celery and munching on it loudly.

“At least Sungjong still have time to prepare for his entrance test next year. Sungyeol, though… by next year, you won’t even be here anymore,” Lord Lee growls, before finally gulping the entire content of liquor, not caring about the overflowing red alcohol to his beard and chest.

What a cruel man, Myungsoo thinks. May the Goddess forgive him for this.

“Father, too much liquor is not good for your health,” Howon reminds his father, cutting Myungsoo’s thought. In front of him, Sungyeol is still munching at his celery stalk.

“Bah!” Master Lee shouts. “I’m old enough to hold my liquor even when I start drinking in the morning.”

“I believe you are,” Howon says. “But don’t you still have to go back to work?”

Master Lee looks at his second son with narrowed eyes, before relenting.

“I know, I know,” he says. “You are not afraid to point out what’s bad for me. Good for me to have a son like you, Howon.”

He stands up after saying that, throwing the last contempt gaze to his eldest and youngest son, before walking out of the room.

The tension in the room dissipates immediately when the door is closed. However, nobody utters a word for a minute, until Sungjong greets his older brother.

“Welcome home, Hyung,” the maknae says, nodding slightly. “And welcome to our humble house, Dongwoo-shi.”

“Thank you, Sungjong,” Howon says.

“You can just call me Hyung,” Dongwoo says kindly to Sungjong. “Howon told me a lot about you, he said you’re really good at playing flute.”

Sungjong blushes, like he always does whenever someone compliments him about his skill. He doesn’t have enough people giving that to him.

“And you must be Sungyeol,” Dongwoo turns to Sungyeol excitedly. “I heard a lot about you from Howon as well.”

“Let me guess,” Sungyeol says, finally stops chewing the celery stalks as he put it back to his plate. “You’ve heard about how I’m going to die in three months.”

Dongwoo, admirably, doesn’t get flustered or awkward at all, being shot by such a straightforward statement from Sungyeol. Instead, he excitedly shakes Sungyeol’s hand.

“I think you’re admirable,” he says. “Howon says you’re always cheerful, I think we’ll get along splendidly.”

“I doubt that,” Sungyeol says. “You know, I’m not supposed to make a new ‘connection’ to other people since it can make me reluctant to die. Myungsoo here is my companion and he’ll make sure you won’t be able to approach me.”

“But Myungsoo-shi let us hang out with Woohyun Hyung earlier,” Sungjong says, before realizing that he has accidentally given Woohyun away. His eyes widening and his hands immediately closes his mouth.

Howon narrows his eyes. Myungsoo wonders if Howon will actually kick Woohyun out, but Dongwoo ruffles Sungjong’s hair, telling him that he is _cute_ , then whines to Howon to take him to his room because he is tired from their long journey.

The topic about Woohyun is forgotten after the duo leaves the room. Sungyeol glares at Sungjong, who immediately realizes that his oldest brother won’t be as lenient as his middle brother’s friend from the academy, and run for his life.

-

 

 

 

Myungsoo sees Howon and Dongwoo a lot after that. They’d be there in the lawn, practicing swordplay or hand combat, sparring against each other or training with the guards.

As much as Myungsoo still feels unsettled with their presence, he likes watching them sparring. No doubt, they’re really good at what they’re doing. It’s like watching them dance instead of spar.

When the sun has gone up too high for them to be outside, they’d retreat into the second story of the library, where the more advanced books are located, and locks themselves inside.

“I’m really surprised that Howon manages to get himself a friend,” Sungyeol says during his afternoon session with Sunggyu in the lower level of the library. Howon and Dongwoo have just passed by their room before going up the stairs. “He’s always so serious all the time, I don’t think he can make time for a friend. In fact, he is too serious it makes him stupid.”

“You’re just jealous,” Sunggyu glares at him for interrupting his explanation. “If you could be half as serious as he is, you won’t be this stupid.”

“Oh, be thankful for my stupidity, Hyung. Without it you’ll have no job,” Sungyeol glares back.

“And if you could have half of his attitude too, I won’t be as inclined to hit your head as many as possible until you behave,” Sunggyu continues. Sungyeol yawns.

“It’s not my fault your lesson is so boring,” Sungyeol closes his book and lies back on the floor. “I’m so bored! Myungsoo, what are you doing?”

Myungsoo who is waiting in front of the door, reading a book written by a monk from another land he brought from the Temple, can’t help but sympathize with the poor scholar.

“I’m studying,” he replies, hoping it will spark a motivation for Sungyeol to study.

Instead, the door behind him slides open and he falls backward into the room. He winces when the back of his head makes a contact with the library wooden floor.

“What do you want?” he demands.

“Sunggyu’s lesson is so boring,” Sungyeol pouts like it is a legitimate lesson to complain.

Sungyeol proposes a bet. If he falls asleep during Sunggyu’s lesson, he’ll agree to prank Howon together later.

He ends up staying in the room, sitting at the back, leaning into the wall while Sunggyu asks Sungyeol to read The Book of Faith and Wisdom loudly.

Sungyeol is right, Sunggyu’s lesson is boring.

Myungsoo almost falls asleep and he pinches his waist to keep him awake. He sees Sungyeol smirking as he reads a passage about filial duty and he grits his teeth.

Myungsoo shouldn’t have a competitive spirit. Competition is meaningless in front of the Goddess who has everything. No, Myungsoo doesn’t have a competitive spirit. He just wants to spare Howon from a prank he doesn’t deserve.

To distract himself from sleepiness, Myungsoo pulls a random book from the lowest row of bookshelf next to him. The cover is made from leather, dark brown like dried blood. It bears Painflower, the symbol of Lee clan on the cover, and a title above the symbol: Lee Family Record.

Out of all books that he can get, why this one? It looks even more boring than Sunggyu’s lecture. Still, Myungsoo thinks there’s nothing to lose to check this one. Faintly, he hears Sunggyu scolding Sungyeol for reading a hanja character wrong as he scans he book roughly.

Wait.

He stops at the last filled page. It holds the record of the current generation of the Lee – Lord Lee himself, his two wives and three sons. Myungsoo knows about Master Lee’s polygamy, but he doesn’t know one thing – Sungyeol and Howon’s birth date.

They are actually born at the same year. Sungyeol on August 27, Howon on March 28.

He looks up at Sungyeol, who is insisting to Sunggyu that his pronunciation over a hanja character is the right one.

So, Sungyeol and Howon were actually born in the same year. Myungsoo knows it’s not impossible, they have different mother after all. However… if Howon was born six months before Sungyeol was, why does Sungyeol get the title of the first son?

He finds the answer as he reads on. Lord Lee apparently married Sungyeol’s mother first, and Howon’s mother after that.

But then… how come Howon was born first? It means that Howon’s mother was pregnant even before the marriage with Lord Lee.

Myungsoo feels dizzy. This feels wrong.

“…Soo?”

He snaps out of his thought and when he looks up Sungyeol and Sunggyu are looking at him with half confused half worried expression.

“You okay?” Sungyeol asks. “You look like you’re spacing out.”

“I’m fine,” Myungsoo quickly says, not moving his finger an inch, not wanting to draw their attention to what he is reading. “I’m just… uh, sleepy.”

Thankfully Sungyeol pays no attention to his book at all as he grins. “Does this mean I win?”

“Win for what?” Sunggyu who is initially still looking at him with inquiring eyes, now completely shifts his attention to Sungyeol.

“Not for you to know,” Sungyeol teases his teacher and stands up, reaching a hand for Myungsoo to take. “Come on, it’s time for afternoon break!”

Myungsoo has to let go of his book to take that hand. He puts the book back on the bookshelf as quickly as he can manage.

“Don’t forget to write half a scroll of what you read today,” Sunggyu instructs before they can leave together.

“Hyung, you want to eat together? Once I’ve deposited Sungyeol at the guest hall I can join you in the staff dining room,” Myungsoo asks the scholar before Sungyeol can manage to drags him away.

He doesn’t usually eat with anybody. He just wants to ask Sunggyu some question, about what he just read.

Sungyeol stops when he hears his question.

“No,” he suddenly says. “No, you can’t eat with him. You’re eating with me today in my room.”

Myungsoo looks at Sungyeol, surprised. “But,” he protests. “You should eat at the guest hall with your brothers.”

“Nobody will miss me anyway, and Father is still at work,” Sungyeol shrugs. Myungsoo looks back at Sunggyu, sending him apologizing look. Sunggyu waves his hand.

“It’s okay. I’m going out for lunch with Woohyun anyway.”

Sungyeol perks up again. “What, you’re going out? Can I come with you?”

“No,” both Myungsoo and Sunggyu say at the same time.

“You know you can’t,” Myungsoo adds when Sungyeol gives him dirty look.

They say good bye to Sunggyu as they walk back to Sungyeol’s quarter in the back of the compound. Sungyeol told a servant to bring his and Myungsoo’s lunch to his room.

“You have something in your mind,” Sungyeol says suddenly when Myungsoo is chewing his vegetable. Caught, Myungsoo chokes on his lettuce and he immediately reaches for water, but too busy coughing.

“Here,” Sungyeol says kindly, offering him a glass of water. Gratefully, Myungsoo accepts and finishes it immediately.

“Thank,” he manages.

“You’re so clumsy,” Sungyeol says amused. “You’re not strict either. What kind of priest are you?”

“I’m not a priest,” Myungsoo corrects. “I’m an acolyte. That’s at least 15 years more before I can even be nominated to be an Assistant.”

“Now that you are calm,” Sungyeol says, “Spill. What’s in your mind?”

Myungsoo avoids looking at Sungyeol’s eyes. Entertaining unhealthy curiosity for a business that isn’t his is a sin.

But, in a way, Myungsoo can see this as part of his business. After all, if Sungyeol is not actually the first born, then the sacrifice won’t be legitimate.

He is afraid to hurt Sungyeol with his question, though.

“It’s the book you read, isn’t it?” Sungyeol opens the conversation for him. “It’s okay, you can ask.”

Myungsoo hesitates, but he really wants to know if Sungyeol is not actually the first born everybody claims him to be.

“You’re actually younger than Howon,” Myungsoo says. “But how come you’re the first born?”

“Father married my mother first,” Sungyeol says.

“I know that, but… I’m sorry for insinuating this about your father, but does that mean he committed intercourse outside the marriage?”

“He impregnated Howon’s mother before he married her, yes,” Sungyeol says.

There are so many reasons Myungsoo can think for that, but none of them make senses. If Lord Lee loved Howon’s mother, then why not marry her first? Did the family oppose and force him to marry Sungyeol’s mother?

“Oh, who am I kidding,” Sungyeol suddenly says. He turns his head to the side, looking at the plum tree in front of his room. They let the door open earlier so wind can enter while they are eating.

“My father only loved Howon’s mother. He didn’t love my mother at all,” he starts.

“Was it arranged marriage, then?”

Sungyeol shakes his head slowly. “No, it was completely voluntary. My father had loved Howon’s mother for a long time, but she refused to marry him because of the Painflower curse in the family. They met each other secretly for a long time – until one day they found out that Howon’s mother was pregnant.

“My father didn’t want the child she bore to be the firstborn of the family, so he married my mother. And then, I was born. He got the firstborn to sacrifice. After that, he married Howon’s mother so Howon is registered as the second born.”

The plum branches are swaying gently as the summer wind blows. It is a sunny afternoon, with clear blue sky and huge white clouds. Sungyeol’s room is warm, but Myungsoo feels something cold inside him.

Hearing such a cruel story to be told so nonchalantly by Sungyeol unsettled him greatly. He can’t take his eyes off from the sacrifice, hoping he will smirk and say that he’s only messing with him like he usually does.

Sungyeol keeps looking at the plum tree and all of a sudden Myungsoo wants to shout at everybody in the house that he is the wrong sacrifice, that maybe – maybe he is not supposed to die.

Then he remembers that he is the one who will draw Sungyeol’s blood at the altar.

Myungsoo swallows heavily. Sungyeol continues.

“Only after Sungjong was born Mother finally learned the truth about her marriage. She became overwhelmed with grief, fell sick and finally died.”

“I’m sorry,” Myungsoo has never felt so useless before. “I’m sure your mother is in a better place now. She is in the Goddess’ flower garden now.”

Sungyeol turns his head toward him. He doesn’t have tears in his eyes, but his face contorts as he recalls the painful memory.

“Tch,” he snorts. “That bloodsucking Goddess of yours, I sincerely hope my mother is not in her garden now.”

Myungsoo feels like a sharp icicle is stabbed right through his heart. He doesn’t know what to do, or what to say.

He doesn’t even rise to defend his God, even when Sungyeol insulted her.

Sungyeol stands up, leaving Myungsoo alone as he retreats into his inner room.

 

 

 

 


End file.
